Hope of Heaven

It has been a very hard weekend. Friday was especially sad for so many. My family went to the funeral for the 2 year old boy who drowned. There were a lot of people there to support them. The funeral was good if you can say that..

We laughed at all the cute videos and smiled at the sweet pictures. There was a precious video of him singing Jesus Loves Me. He had so much joy and didn't have a care in the world. He truly loved life. Jesus tells us to watch and learn from little children.

"And he said: 'I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.'" Matthew 18:3

We also cried because there is so much pain. Nothing can take that away.

After the service, we went to the grave site. A lot of people also went to the grave site. This family is so loved. Once everyone was there we read a scripture and released doves. While we watched the doves fly around, they played Jesus Loves Me again. We smiled at the thought of being in heaven, and being free from pain. But we came back to reality and realized that we aren't free from pain here. We hugged the family and just cried with them. Our lives will eventually go back to "normal"..but theirs won't. We need to keep reaching out to them for months and years to come. It's still hard thinking about it.

This song is one that they played at the funeral. If you have a chance, go listen to it. It's so sweet.

Glory Baby by Watermark

Glory Baby, You slipped away
As fast as we could say baby, baby
You were growing, what happened Dear,
You disappeared on us baby, baby
Heaven will hold you before we do
Heaven will keep you safe
Until we're home with you

Until we're home with you
CHORUS
We miss you everyday, miss you in every way
But we know there's a day when we will hold you, we will hold you
And you'll kiss our tears away, when we're home to stay
We can't wait for the day when we will see you, we will see you

so baby let sweet Jesus hold you, until mom and dad can hold you
You'll just have heaven before we do
You'll just have heaven before we do
Sweet little baby, it's hard to understand it
Cause we are hurting, we are hurting
But there is healing, and we know we're stronger people
Through the growing, and in knowing
All things work together for our good
And God works his purposes
Just like he said he would, just like he said he would
CHORUS
We miss you everyday, miss you in every way
But we know there's a day when we will hold you, we will hold you
And you'll kiss our tears away, when we're home to stay
We can't wait for the day when we will see you, we will see you
So baby let sweet Jesus hold you, until mom and dad can hold you
You'll just have heaven before we do
You'll just have heaven before we do

BRIDGE
I can't imagine Heaven's lullabies
And what they must sound like
But I will rest in knowing
Heaven is your home
And it's all you'll ever know, all you'll ever know

"Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words." 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18

Almost my whole family is sick. My dad has pneumonia and my brother has a sinus infection. It's just wonderful.

I've not been feeling too well. I'm not really eating anything. It's been like this for a week or so. I'm just not hungry. If something does sound good, we'll fix it, but by the time that I start to eat, it doesn't sound good anymore. I'm always nauseous and when I eat it gets worse.

We talked to my doctor in Seminole and I'm going to see her next week. We have to figure out what to do about this because I can't lose anymore weight. I've lost so much already.

Thursday I'm going to see a sleep specialist. This will be another doctor to add to the list.

Today I've been so achy and in so much pain. I've had to take my pain medicine as often as I can. When the pain medicine starts wearing off, I don't even move because of the pain. I also have a fever and a cough. We're watching it very closely. I would rather not end up in the hospital with the flu or pneumonia.

My mom accessed my port for the first time today without a nurse here. It went well! I'm leaving it accessed for a few days since I'm feeling so bad. I'll probably do at least an IV a day.

Please keep praying for the little boy's family. And also that I will not get too seriously sick.