Lyme Disease Awarness Month

Thirst

I was able to go to thirst, the spiritual discipline class, on Monday! I'm sad that I am going to miss a few weeks while in Nevada and Brazil. We did several different disciplines. One of them was where we listened to several verses 3 times. We were supposed to just listen and notice what word or phrase stuck out to us each time because God shows us different things that apply to us at that moment in our lives. We discussed how the purpose of reading the Bible is not to know facts, but to hear what God has to say to you right then. Scripture is the living word of God. It means different things for each person every time you read it.

Here are the verses that were read to us 3 times.

"As Jesus approached Jericho, a blind man was sitting by the roadside begging. 36When he heard the crowd going by, he asked what was happening. They told him, "Jesus of Nazareth is passing by."

He called out, "Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!"

Those who led the way rebuked him and told him to be quiet, but he shouted all the more, "Son of David, have mercy on me!"

Jesus stopped and ordered the man to be brought to him. When he came near, Jesus asked him, "What do you want me to do for you?"

"Lord, I want to see," he replied. "

-Luke 18:35-41

Before we listened to this, we were asked to either picture ourselves as a character in the story, or as a person in the crowd.

After we listened to this, we were told to picture Jesus saying our name and then saying "what do you want from me?"

Another discipline we took from that was thinking of our answer when Jesus asks us that. Jesus comes up to you and says your name. Then He asks "what do you want?" What would you say? Maybe you actually want to feel freedom from sin. Once we got a phrase, we each thought of a name to call Christ. An example would be Savior or Redeemer. When we got a name we said the name breathing in, then the phrase breathing out. If you practice this enough, it will become like breathing. You will think of it all the time and it will be your focus. An example of the phrase is, Savior.... show me where you want me. It can be whatever you want.

Back to the passage above. The first 2 times the scriptures were read, I had no idea what God wanted me to hear. But when I heard it the 3rd time, I heard the verse "Jesus stopped and ordered the man to be brought to him."

This man is blind. He really doesn't know what is going on. I imagine that he felt overwhelmed by how fast things are happening. He does know that Jesus is somewhere in the crowd by him.

The blind man really wants to see Jesus but he doesn't think it is going to happen because Jesus is going by him. But when he calls out to Jesus, Jesus stops. Jesus actually STOPS.

Last week I mentioned that so many things are happening extremely fast in my life that I have no control over. I've had no choice but to blindly sit there are watch. But when I heard that verse I realized that Jesus IS with me in this. Everything is happening so fast but He actually stops and carries me. I can see Him now because I realized that He meets me where I am.

"When you cross deep rivers, I will be with you, and you won't drown. When you walk through fire, you won't be burned or scorched by the flames." Isaiah 43:2

"I am the Lord your God. I am holding your hand, so don't be afraid. I am here to help you." Isaiah 41:13

What Am I Doing?

I gave into temptations and got a Twitter. If you don't know what that is, it's just a page where I can update with short phrases about what I am doing or my thoughts. You can see my updates on the right side of my blog under the about me section. My actual page is http://twitter.com/InBetterHands33. In Nevada, I will be updating that a lot so you can keep up with what treatments and different things I am doing. I will also update it in Brazil so you can see what we are doing there! I think this will be a good way to let you know more specifically what I do during treatments. I hope this is helpful!

Everything is happening so fast.

Friday was my nana's surgery. It went well. I'm not really sure what happens next.

Here is the bad news. There are so many things that are happening so fast. Thursday I found out nana has cancer, Friday she had surgery. Yesterday we booked our flight to Nevada to see my Lyme doctor. When are we going? Oh in 8 days. You think I'm joking? No. Since the cardiologist appointment didn't go well we are going to Nevada to try different things. In 8 days. We will be gone for 2 weeks.

The good news. In 4 weeks my family and I are going to Brazil! I know your first thought is "are they CRAZY?" The answer is yes we are. Since my dad is in charge of missions at church, we get to go around the world visiting missionaries! We can't complain about that! This will be our 3rd time to Brazil. First we are going to Rio/Niteroi and we get to hang out with the Niteroi team! I used to take voice lessons in middle school and my voice teacher was Carrie Gotcher. A couple years ago they became part of a mission team to Niteroi. We are so excited to see them!!!

Then we are going to Iguazu Falls which is on the border of Brazil and Argentina. It is one of the biggest falls in the world. It looks amazing. Here is a picture!

Last we are going to Campinas. I have talked about the Duttons who were just here in January. They live in Campinas so we get to stay with them! It will be so great!

Last year we had a call from some missionaries in New Zealand. They are from Oklahoma, and during furlough last year, they got Lyme Disease. They didn't have symptoms until they were back in New Zealand. Somehow (obviously God) they talked to someone who knew that I had Lyme. The day after we got back from Nevada, they called us and begged for help. No one in New Zealand treats Lyme so they were on their own. They were so sick. We told them immediately to go to Nevada. They have gone a couple times in the past year. Well they will be at the clinic the same time we will! We haven't actually met but now we will get to!! Also, Robin Dutton (missionary in Brazil) will be in Nevada with us too! It is going to be a party! So we'll be with her for a week or two then be in Brazil a few weeks later!!

I get back from Nevada on Monday May 17th and leave for Brazil Friday May 21st.

This weekend I get to go on the youth retreat! I leave Friday and come back Sunday. Then I leave for Reno on Monday. It is going to be a crazy month with lots of challenges and adventures.

Urgent prayer request

Yesterday I found out that my nana (my dad's mom) has breast cancer. She is having surgery today so will you please keep her in your prayers. It's great because all of my dad's side of the family lives in our neighborhood or the neighborhood next to us! So thankfully we get to go to the surgery today. Thanks for praying!

My quilt!

I am always cold. Ever since I started having heart problems, I can't get warm. So for my birthday, my mom decided to make me a rag quilt!! We picked out material and she started making it! There were a couple people from church who helped her with the design and then the verses that are on it.

I love tropical colors. My room is tropical! So for my quilt we got the same colors. On each row there is also a black and white square. It looks great with some black and white! There are 3 squares that have verses on them. I picked out some of my favorite verses.

Here it is!

I love to sing so there is a couple squares of music notes :)

The back is all that pattern.

Here are the verses.

I love it so much!! So does everyone else in the world! Everyone keeps wanting it for themselves. I need to watch it so that they don't take it!!

I love this song.

Everything I Need by Kutless

When every step is so hard to take
And all of my hope is fading away
When life is a mountain that I can not climb
You carry me, Jesus carry me.
You Are strength in my weakness
You are the refuge I seek
You are everything in me time of need
You are everything, You are everything I need
When every moment is more than I can take
And all of my strength is slipping away
When every breath gets harder me
You carry me, Jesus carry me
You Are strength in my weakness
You are the refuge I seek
You are everything in me time of need
You are everything, You are everything I need
I need You
You are everything I need
I love everything about You
You Are strength in my weakness
You are the refuge I seek
You are everything in me time of need
You are everything, You are everything I need

No more cardiologist visits....

This post is going to have a lot in it so I hope it doesn't get confusing...

Yesterday we headed up to the hospital for my cardiologist appointment. We checked in and waited. Then we waited some more. Then the nurse called us back!! But she only did my vitals...they still didn't have a room for me. My parents and I play a fun game called "predict my vitals"! We take bets on what my blood pressure and heart rate is. Unfortunately, we didn't play yesterday...Finally we got into my room over an hour after my appointment was scheduled. Next, I got to change into those adorable hospital gowns. Let me tell you, if you have never gotten to wear one, you are missing out the luckiest person alive. We knew what was coming next. The nurse came in to do an EKG.

Soon after that, the cardiologist came in. We talked for so long. He said that since I can't handle beta blockers or any other medicines he has given me, that there is nothing he can do. He started a sermon about how we just have to deal with things and get over it. I always complain about how hard and fast I can feel my heart beating 24/7. Then when they put me on medicine I complain because my blood pressure is too low. So he said that if I can't deal with that, that we just need to figure out what to do ourselves and that we really don't need to see him anymore. Has HE ever had this?! I can't just ignore my extremely hard and fast beating heart or ignore almost passing out and not being able to get up because of my low blood pressure. He also insists on me getting off my sleeping medicine because he believes that is what's causing my heart problems. He decided he wanted an ECHO (ultrasound of the heart) done right then. So we went across the hallway to the ECHO place. He looked at the results and they were fine. He is a very nice doctor. I understand why he can't do anything, but it still makes me mad. Every doctor does this to me. "I'm sorry, we don't know why this is happening and we can't do anything about it. Good luck!" I'm tired of hearing that!!! I guess it's good that I don't have to see him anymore. One less doctor to deal with.

So I'm not taking the beta blockers or any heart medicine. I'm also slowly getting off my sleep medicine. I NEED that sleep medicine. It's the only thing that has helped and trust me, we have tried everything. Today I started back on the long list of liquids and pills. We are going to be talking to my pain management team since they are the ones who put me on the sleep medicine. They told that they know how horrible it is when I don't take the sleep medicine so they are trying to think of something else to do. That's where we are right now. It's frustrating having so many doctors tell you so many different things and make you decide what is right. Usually that's WHY you go to a doctor. After my appointment I broke down walking down the hall to the elevators. I don't know why, but it just makes me upset when I have another doctor tell me there's nothing he can do and I just have to deal with it.

Here are 2 songs that I really love. They have great messages.

The Power of Your Name by Lincoln Brewster

"Surely children weren't made for the streets

And fathers were not made to leave

Surely this isn't how it should be

Let Your Kingdom come

Surely nations were not made for war

Or the broken meant to be ignored

Surely this just can't be what You saw

Let Your Kingdom come

Here in my heart

I will live

To carry Your compassion

To love a world that's broken

To be Your hands and feet

I will give

With the life that I've been given

And go beyond religion

To see the world be changed

By the power of Your name

Surely life wasn't made to regret

And the lost were not made to forget

Surely faith without action is dead

Let Your Kingdom come

Lord break this heart

Your name

Is a shelter for the hurting

Jesus Your name

Is a refuge for the weak

Only Your name

Can redeem the undeserving

Jesus Your name

Holds everything I need"

Until The Whole World Hears by Casting Crowns

Lord, I want to feel with Your heart
See the world through Your eyes
I want to be Your hands and feet
I want to live a life that leads


Ready yourselves, ready yourselves
Let us shine the light of Jesus in the darkest night
Ready yourselves, ready yourselves
May the powers of darkness tremble as our praises rise


Until the whole world hears, Lord, we are calling out
Lifting up Your name for all to hear the sound
Like voices in the wilderness we’re crying out
And as the day draws near, we’ll sing until the whole world hears


Lord, let Your sleeping giant rise
Catch the demons by surprise
Holy nations sanctify
Let this be our battle cry


Ready yourselves, ready yourselves
Let us shine the light of Jesus in the darkest night
Ready yourselves, ready yourselves
May the powers of darkness tremble as our praises rise


Woah, woah, sing until the whole world hears
Woah, woah, sing until the whole world hears

I want to be Your hands and feet
I want to live a life that leads
To see You set the captive free
Until the whole world hears
And I pray the day will see
More of You and less of me
Lord, I want my life to be
The song You sing